On Alter Egos and Infinite Literacies, Part I

Fleshy Professional Avatar spent the weekend in Richmond, Virginia with colleagues and friends at the Association for the Study of African-American Life and History.  I tagged along for the ride, made a minor appearance in time to introduce myself to amazing and dynamic public intellectuals like @NewBlackMan and @DrJamesPeterson.  Then I dove right back in to life and work here in the DMV with the arrival of the Mobile Homecoming Project (@alexispauline and @juliawallace) for their week-long university residency.  This was another event Fleshy Professional Avatar was signed up to do but I hung out in the wings, dipping in when Alexis and Julia referenced their trip to AMC 2011 and the Shawty Got Skillz workshop, taking a breath of peace when I saw @Mdotwrites and as I was introduced to another professor-cum-insurgent.  And when I looked up, I turned around to find we’d formed a circle of womyn of color who do intense intellectual work and activism around saving our own lives in spaces that are almost universally hostile to everything we are and represent.  And yet…there we were.  Queering the space with our very own light energy, turning the room on its side and moving the group as a whole along a new wavelength of ultraviolet visibility.

For a moment, just long enough to breath in and out twice, I was able to be Kismet and Flesh at the same time.  The two bodies overlapped and co-existed in time and space together.

But it was only a moment.

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In the Future, We Kill Our Attackers: Rihanna’s “Man Down” as Afrofuturist Text


Rihanna’s video for “Man Down”  dropped last week and set the web on fire.  The way justice and rape, innocence and violence work in the video–and the non-sensical responses to it–have already been outlined by better writers than me.

I’m writing this post to take the video to its logical conclusion:

In the future, do we kill our attackers?

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Submit to the #ComeCorrect Spring Fever Blog Carnival!!!

Lady in Red. Posted by Rocka-Bye Baby! Reblogged by Come Correct

Submit to the #ComeCorrect Spring Fever Blog Carnival!!!

“When all else fails, masturbate like its May,” ~La Bianca

You can’t describe it but you know it when it’s here. You notice the sun warming the air and your skin flushes. Hot. Unrelenting. This heat is brazen. It slides beneath the hem of your shirt and strokes the skin of your thighs. It fingers the zipper of your jeans. It begs, cajoles, climbs into your mouth and between your teeth and trembles there.

Spring fever is here. And there is no better time to #ComeCorrect

Bring it on!

If you are a black gyrl who knows black feminist sex is the best sex EVER…..if you’re a Puerto Rican mami who believes radical women of color cum harder….if you’re an Asian boi who loves bondage…if you’re an activist building an archive of intimate relations in rural communities….if you’re a professor teaching a class on Sexting While Black……

Bring. It. On.

The way it works: Write where you live, but send in a link to your post (and/or HTML or embed URLs if it’s a vLog or image) by midnight on Monday, June 21, 2011 to bettacomecorrect@gmail.com (just in time for summer!).

There are ZERO restrictions. Previously published posts, images, and videos are all welcome! The organizers are cis women of color and we strongly encourage contributions from trans and cis women, nonbinary and trans* feminists of color

Don’t hold back–this carnival is so very Not Safe For Work (#NSFW). We want it to burn the glossy off your monitor.

The #ComeCorrect Spring Fever carnival will be hosted across the interwebs @:

Come Correct
Crunk Feminists Collective
Latino Sexuality
Mamita Mala
Manifest Freedom
New Model Minority
Nunez Daughter
Pretty Magnolia

Quirky Black Girls

The WOC Survival Kit

If you’re interested in hosting, shoot us an email. If you’d like to curate the next one, let us know!

Questions, comments? Hit up bettacomecorrect@gmail.com or ask online at http://bettacomecorrect.tumblr.com/ask.

Your #ComeCorrect curators this #FeverSeason are:

Pretty Magnolia

The WOC Survival Kit






Kismet Nuñez is one of the Skillsharers of the of the 3rd Annual INCITE! Shawty Got Skillz workshop at the 2011 Allied Media Conference! Help us get to Detroit! Click here!

A Day in the Life: Kismet & Mr.

On Monday, I woke up anxious.

I’d been watching Grey’s Anatomy all night and the Christina-Burke story line was stuck in my head.

Remember that one?  Yeah.  You do.  It’s the one where a young, professional woman of color falls for a mature, professional man of color, slowly loses herself in his expectations of their relationship, and gets left at the altar only because he couldn’t make her go through with it.

(yeah.  that one.)

Most of me knows that Shonda Rhimes is to black (professional) love as Tyler Perry is to black (professional) women…


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Thursday Readin’: Finishing Dolen’s Wench

With slut walks, slut shaming, #KanazawaScience and Beyonce running the world , this may be a Most Complicated Week Ever for #blackfeministsex.  Whew!

So why not kick off Thursday Readin’ with a few final reflections on Dolen Perkins-Valdez’s novel Wench?

The Cool Kidz Book Club (@fortyoneacres  & @Mdotwrites) started and finished this book last year.  And I won’t even pretend I read slow.  I don’t.  But I do read with careful attention to violence and danger.  And since I research women & slavery all day, everyday in the Flesh, I need to watch how I enter that space when I am reading for pleasure.

Lucky for me, Valdez got me in and out safely.  She pushed me but she didn’t burn me up and she didn’t leave me with the happies.  She left me just where I should be after a book about enslaved women negotiating for their lives–disturbed, invigorated and ready for battle.

Reading Wench Part 3 & 4 after the jump….

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Updates! Updates! Updates!

Things have been pretty quiet lately.  But spring is here and everyone is waking up.  Ms. Walker‘s in the kitchen, making dinner.  Pretty Magnolia is with her, washing the greens and watching her own reflection silver through the running water.  The Sable Fan Gyrl is walking barefoot outside, waiting for the sun set.  And I’m writing to you.

I’ve got updates.

  • Shawty got Skillz: Nuñez Daughter is trying to get to AMC!

Actually the whole crew is.  The WOC Survival Kit, theSable Fan Gyrl, Zora Walker and Pretty Magnolia will be there & in full effect.  If we can raise the funds.

Allied Media Conference is an annual gathering of journalists, writers, bloggers, artists, organizers, mamis, youth, pets–folks who are really interested in participatory media & social justice:

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Kismet is trying to get to AMC!

Kismet Nuñez, the WOC Survival Kit and the rest of the iwannalive crew is going to be at the Allied Media Conference this year! And we are sharin’ our skillz with other fierce folks from across the interwebs. But to get us all to Detroit, shawties gotta fundraise:

Hello Interwebs!

It’s about that time again for the best conference ever! Yes The Allied Media Conference will be happening June 23-26 in Detroit and we want to be there!

Who are we?

We are the Skillsharers of the 3rd Annual INCITE! Shawty Got Skillz workshop! We are cis women, trans* and genderqueer people of color making media that directly mingles our personal lives with the political issues we care about. We believe, as Audre Lorde did, that “it is better to speak, knowing we were never meant to survive.” We are all pushing the boundaries of what media is capable of and sharing the lessons of that experience with each other, and would love for you to help us get to Detroit this June to do just that!

Skillsharers include but aren’t limited to:

Shelby Goodwin







who will be presenting topics that range from: Nihilism for Negroes, What Up Doe! Detroit Hustle & Resistance, Sex Worker Saftey, How to Tumbl & Tweet for Social Justice, and so much more!

YOU can help us get there by:

  • Reposting! – Tell folks that we are trying to get to the AMC! Tweet, Tumbl, Facebook, Myspace (I mean, there are still some folks on there) telling folks about what skills we are sharing and ask them to support us getting to the conference! Should you feel so inclined to blog or tumbl about it we can put your post on our site!
  • Pre-Buying our ‘Zine! – We know a lot of folks aren’t going to make it to the AMC and we also know that what we share there is going to be amazing! We will document all the fabulousness of the skills shared with a zine, dropbox folder, and cd that encompasses digital versions of the skills we shared all housed online in a dropbox or via a CD or zine we could mail to you. For just $7 (the price of a fancy cup of coffee) you can live or relive the dream that was this years Skillshare!

We need to raise $6 G’s to get all 15 of us to the AMC (a low estimate)! YOU can donate Here! We so appreciate what ever you can give! A reblog and a tweet make us so happy!!!



Shawty Got Skillz Skillshare Crew

Help us get there! Kismet’s been daydreaming about being at AMC–where black girls are queerky, mamis are radical and activism is sexy–since she first began a little ole blog named Waiting 2 Speak. YOU can help her make it happen! Let’s go! Fifty dollars or fifty cents (no really; she’ll take it…..)

Head over to the Shawty Got Skillz Tumblr to donate, browse our projects, read our bios, and hear more. And please support!!!!

ATL Shawties got skillz too! We are traveling from all over!

Come Correct or Go Home

“Can you be a good feminist if you have intimate engagements with partners who have diametrically opposed gender politics?

On March 31st, 2011, crunktastic of the Crunk Feminist Collective wrote this post on the politics of black feminist sex:

“How do we change this thinking in our communities that a woman’s behavior is responsible for pushing a man over the edge? That she can ever do something to deserve to be beaten to a pulp? That a man has a right to a violent response simply because he doesn’t like the way he’s being talked to or treated? That violence is a legitimate response to being mistreated?  That any policy other than non-violence  (on all sides) is good for relationships? That men are out-of-control beings around whom we must tread on eggshells?

And if I ask my students to question their assumptions and to demand better treatment in their relationships, then what kinds of things must I demand in mine? And does that standard apply to all relationships, romantic and platonic?

Can you be a good feminist if you have intimate engagements with partners who have diametrically opposed gender politics?”

She was concerned about what she believed might be the questionable politics of a lover/homie/friend who supported Chris Brown’s outrageous, unconscionable and violent behavior on the set of Good Morning America [I refuse to feed this man’s ego by linking to it here.  You know where Google is]:

“In a post last year, I lamented the fact that I was meeting men who were rarely physically interested in me and who were always and only intrigued by my mind. Now I’ve met someone worthy of genuine interest, and my brain and my politics are getting in the way again.  But while last time, I was concerned that my brain occupied too much space in my romantic encounters, this time around I’m afraid to check it at the door…

I mean should I withhold sex from dudes with sexist attitudes as an act of solidarity with my sisters?…

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